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i smell sweaty

gender roles and the patriarchy and Sticking It To The Man

My Going-To-Sleep meditation is called "what if boys didn't exist." Once I become certain that boys don't exist I can sleep. Otherwise I am awake until it's light outside.

Today I said good-bye to one of my dearest friends. Eugene/Anacalgon 9/Power Lloyd has gone to car heaven. (I'm lying again. I didn't say good-bye because I was in the middle of an episode of Lost [which I mostly hate] and it's actually going to live with my uncle.)

HOWEVER. I now have a new friend and her name is Sally Struthers and you couldn't pick her out of a lineup.

New Car = New Attitude. I am going to plow through life with the voracity of a Furious Reader and the veracity of a bullet. HOW ABOUT THAT. I am not waiting around and if my feelings keep getting accidentally hurt I will eat them like a mother and her baby hamster. I will never get my feelings hurt I will meet my husband on Match.com I will write scathing letters to Cosmopolitan I will go to Africa and feed all the Congolese I will adopt a Vietnamese baby I will eat more vegannaise I will take up oil-painting I will never be alone. 

I am just really exhausted and I want someone to pay attention to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OKAY SO I LIED

SHUT UP EVERYONE IS A HYPOCRITE

I want to smoke all the cigarettes but I can't smoke any so instead I will lie in bed eating a whole box of neopolitan-flavored ice cream and then I will fall asleep at 8:15 PM.

internet abuse

I have watched "All The Single Ladies" on youtube at least seventeen times in the past twenty four hours and it is time for me to get rid of this blog. Failed experiment!

Today my sister and I are cleaning our rooms. The entire time she's been cleaning she has left up a skype window with the exchange student, who just went home. (we took her to the airport last weekend and she cried and waved walking backward into the plane and then we felt drained of color for a day.) Except sometimes she takes breaks to work on a vlog for her youtube account? I just walked past her and she said officiously: "I am feeling frustrated." I assumed she was talking to me and said a whole lot of things back about realizing our rooms were bursting at the seams and then noticed I was interrupting her vlogging process. I said I felt awkward about it. She said, "it's okay, I'm editing you out."

separately I AM GOING A LITTLE CRAZY AROUND HERE